I got the coolest doll off eBay for a buck.  It’s a Mikhail Gorbachev doll produced around 1990.  He’s about 10 inches tall and when you squeeze him he squeaks.  I’m trying to figure out how I can rig a voicebox so he says “glasnost” and “perestroika.”  That would be sweet.

Anyway, here is Gorby:

Gorby is wearing black corduroy pants, a red and black striped shirt, and a black leather jacket that says “Gorby” on the back.  I found this to be quite odd, as I never knew about Mikhail Gorbachev’s secret life as a Hell’s Angel.  I would expect a Gorby doll to be dressed in a suit, but eh, whatever.

In other news, good luck to all those college grads in search of a job!

Tony Blair is going to be on the Simpsons…well, his voice anyways.

“Fifty years ago today Russia was delivered from the long nightmare of Joseph Stalin. The man who murdered his compatriots by the millions, who for three decades immersed his country in bloody terror, was finally gone.

An interesting article in today’s NY Times suggests that Stalin was poisoned by Beria.  Supposedly Stalin was planning to wage a war along the Pacific Coast of the U.S., so Beria decided to get rid of him.  Good idea.

“Comrades, Vladimir Ilich’s health has grown so much worse lately that it is to be feared he will soon be no more. We must therefore consider what is to be done when the great sorrow befalls us…. Modern science is capable of preserving his body for a considerable time, long enough at least for us to grow used to the idea of his being no longer with us.” – Joseph Stalin

Lenin’s Mausoleum was definitely high on my list of favorite excursions in Russia…odd, I know. Contrary to popular belief, there is not a never ending Disneyesque line to see the former Soviet leader’s body (or wax dummy, if you believe that). We stood in line for about 5 minutes before being allowed to walk to the mausoleum (for some reason, the Russians block off half of Red Square during the mausoleum’s “open” hours). Before proceeding into the mausoleum you are searched for cameras, of course. When you enter the nice air-conditioned tomb, you walk down a flight of stairs…I almost tripped down them due to the lack of light. Then you proceed to the room with Lenin…and there he is chilling in his glass coffin. My first thought was “damn, he’s short”…because he is…and he is also wearing a black tie with white polka dots…what’s up with that? They should change his tie color according to the seasons. Anyways…you walk around Lenin’s glass coffin under the watchful eyes of four very serious-looking guards. I suppose that the Soviets meant for this to be a solemn place, but when I got out of the mausoleum I wanted to laugh…because it is so crazy that they preserved Lenin’s body and put it on display for millions of people to gawk at! Lenin would have been sooo pissed if he knew Stalin was going to do that.