Have I ever told you how my parents love to talk about polar bears? Oh, yeah, I have. Almost every time I talk to them on the phone, they are bringing up some story about polar bears swimming 60 miles to find food, or polar bears cannibalizing each other, or whatever.
Anyways, when I arrived home on Thursday morning, I was greeted with this:
As I stared in disbelief at my polar bear Christmas decoration, now floating in our pool on several pieces of styrofoam, my mom remarked, “Gee, Lindsay, I hope the poor polar bear doesn’t start to eat himself.”
(Despite all this, they claim to be very proud that I work for “Big Oil.” Really, I think they are just glad I managed to find a job despite spending five years studying a country that no longer exists.)
But the real question is, what to do with a hungry polar bear that is roaming around your backyard? Well, shoot it, of course, and have it promptly turned into a rug to be placed in front of your fireplace.
(This photo was actually taken several years ago, and there is a story behind it that I’ve just been too lazy to write about. I will eventually, I guess.)
Kidding, of course. The polar bear is safely ensconced in front of our house, opposite the penguin decoration. Yes, our front yard resembles a real life Coca-Cola ad.