Back in December, Ryan and I went to Los Angeles for a day to visit a Soviet submarine, eat some hot dogs, and admire the La Brea Tar Pits.
First stop, Long Beach – probably the last place on earth you would expect to find a Soviet submarine. Docked alongside the Queen Mary is the Soviet diesel sub B-247, which somehow acquired the nickname “Scorpion” when it landed in American hands (and is thus now referred to as the Scorpion).
Before you go onto the sub, you watch this ultra-cheesy movie about the history of submarines and the role they played in the Cold War. God, it was seriously the WORST movie ever. But anyways, on to the sub…
Here I am on the deck of the submarine:
There was hardly anyone on the submarine when we were there, which was great because it’s pretty tight quarters inside.
The “Secret Room”, which has a cool looking Kalashnikov:
Living on a Soviet sub sure wasn’t comfortable:
Ryan looking through the periscope:
This random Russian guy came up to us and showed us how to turn the scope around so you can get a 360 degree view. I looked on the sub’s website when I got home, and I’m pretty sure it was the former Soviet naval officer that occasionally gives tours…but I didn’t recognize him when we were on the sub because he wasn’t wearing his uniform.
Target: Long Beach, where thousands of ships dock each year to unload cheap goods produced by our exploited comrades in Asia! Down with the capitalist pigs in LA! Workers of the world, unite…or something…
Even though this sign was posted throughout the sub, Ryan insisted on playing with all the dials and switches…I half-expected to hear someone yelling “Dive! Dive!”
Loading torpedoes in order to sink a few ships here and there:
It’s literally right next to the Queen Mary:
After you exit the sub, you can purchase a wide variety of souvenirs. I was actually quite impressed with the selection, but didn’t buy anything because, as scary as it sounds, I already own about half of the stuff you could buy there.
We were quite hungry after our morning of loading heavy torpedoes and sinking large cargo ships carrying XBox360s to the mainland, so we decided to grab some hot dogs at Pink’s in Hollywood. Now, this isn’t any old hot dog stand…it’s pretty well-known. I kept hearing about it from friends and family, and then saw a show about it on the Travel Channel, so I suggested we go down there to see if these hot dogs were worthy of all this praise.
The line at Pink’s is VERY long…I think we waited something like 35 or 45 minutes…but, that’s OK, because it gives you ample time to look over the menu and decide what hot dog(s) you want. I opted for the “Ozzy Osbourne” dog (Spicy Polish dog, nacho cheese, American cheese, grilled onions, guacamole & chopped tomatoes) and onion rings, while Ryan chose the Ozzy dog and “Guadalajara” dog (relish, onions, tomatoes, topped with sour cream).
Here is our order, in all of its calorie-laden glory:
It was messy eating all of this, but yes, we managed to finish all of it:
After Pink’s, we went to the La Brea Tar Pits:
I’ve never been to the tar pits before, and they were actually very interesting…more so than I expected.
I love the fake animals trapped in the pits:
There’s also a museum with tons of fossils and a history of the La Brea tar pits…here I am preparing for my role as CEO of a major oil corporation:
Just a typical park in Los Angeles:
Ohhhh, just kidding.
The rest of the photos are here. You can also read Ryan’s post here.
If you’re ever in LA and are looking for something to do, now you know where to go…come on, a Soviet sub is much more fun than a bunch of stars on a sidewalk.